I discovered that my wife used https://onlinedivorcer.com/online-divorce-hawaii and she intended to leave me and our home, so I am writing my story to share... A man can come to terms with a divorce, which occurred on his initiative, because he has a new girlfriend, younger and more beautiful than his wife. But it is very difficult for a man to agree with the divorce initiated by his wife. The fact is that it is difficult for a man - precisely because he considers himself (and everyone considers him) a strong being, controlling his family, his life - it is difficult to accept that this family and his whole usual life breaks down not of his own free will, but at the request of the wife.
This casts doubt on his strength, his manhood, his ability to be a leader, the head of anything. In addition, a man also considers the creation of a family to be his achievement. Maybe not the most important and brilliant, not the one to be proud of, but the basic, necessary, self-evident. And here his basic achievement is crossed out, reduced to zero ...
I could hardly be called an exemplary husband, but I was not bad either. Like all men, I could stay late at work or sit with a friend in a cafe after work. I could not notice that my wife bought a new dress, not make her the comment she was waiting for. I could put all the household chores on her, I could tell her something offensive. This is how everyone lived, and it seemed to me that my wife would put up with it, like all other wives. But she did not accept it. The divorce became for me not only the strongest trauma, but in some way also a revelation.
For some time after the divorce, I tried to prove to the whole world that I am strong, independent, carefree. In a word, I am the master of my own destiny. I walked right and left, went to trendy resorts, bought a fancy car. At the same time, I did not spare myself at work, I moved forward. I wanted people to stop feeling sorry for me, but, on the contrary, began to envy me, to start feeling sorry for my wife, who missed such a man.
Deep down, I probably hoped that people would stop believing that she left me (they don’t abandon such men!) And begin to think that I left her ... Then one day I thought: "You are trying to deceive yourself and others." I gave up on self-deception, and this is what helped me survive after the divorce. I admitted that I was not an ideal husband, that my wife had every right to leave me, to start a new life. That I, too, can start a new life, ceasing to cling to the past ... Since the divorce was really easy to both of us (despite psychological exhaustion) and it was a way simpler than I expected (we passed through the most of process online and then just appeared at court to the divorce hearing) I believe that it will be a new beginning in both lives of me and my ex!
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